Sunday, April 13, 2008

i feel like im living in National Geographic

today its really hot, i mean really hot. so my fam opened up all the windows and doors, which i dont mind for the most part. but these people i live with dont understand that you only do that shit for so long. im walking into my bathroom and there is this big ass 3 inch mosquito sitting on the wall, scared the shit outta me. then little flies are everywhere, like every time i go in the bathroom or kitchen there are little tiny flies flying all up in my face, then as im eating in the kitchen there is this flying 1 inch bug sitting on a fridge. then i walk in a hall and there is a spider on the ceiling. I swear to God i feel like im living in National Geographic, i mean WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THESE WHITE PEOPLE!??????????????!?!?!?!?!?! SHIT! why are they so obsessed with this shit! it's like every now and then i think to myself "who are these people im living with and why are they so weird?" why do they leave windows open when its freezing outside and when i tell them so, they tell me to wear something warm? are you serious? im freezing my balls off and i gotta wear a sweater inside my own house? people heat their houses why we gotta freeze to death just to get "fresh air"?

then on top of that i got a D on my test so the new thing is that if i get another D or lower im going to have to move out. are you serous? didnt you say im gonna move out at the end of the year what the fuck? if i move out now then what the fuck am i gonna do? shit i dont know, this class is really hard but this is just crazy. i had an interview for internship and im real confident that i got it but if i move out that internship goes out the window cuz im gonna have to find a 9/5 and kiss my education goodbye and im like a year away from completing it.

im tired of these people. i was talking to my therapist about it and he told me that parents supposed to guard and protect their children and teach them how to make it in this world but i had none of that shit. and hes right, if anything my fam did was make me worse. so now when im still living with them trying to get an education they setting these deadlines for me to move. first its at the end of the year, now its at the end of the month? are you fucking serious? i dont know what im gonna do. my plan though is wake up tomorrow, get all my shit, my voice recorder and go over it in the library, fuck staying in this piece of shit National Geographic dump.

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