today we were watching a movie in my class about a custodian facility. movie was called Tattooed Tears and this one part hit me pretty hard. This dude was locked up in a cell all isolated. the guards put him there because he attempted to commit suicide so he was on suicide watch. so hes sitting in that bitch with a towel wrapped around the bars so that no one can open the cell door. and then the guard says "why you cutting yourself? blah blah blah" and said something about him getting out so the kid is like "i aint getting out, thats what you all told me. so what's the point of just sittin here?". then the guard goes... 'now you gonna have to be taken on a trip to a hospital and back' and the kid goes "good, at least it's gonna be some excitment" and the guard goes.... "excitment for who?" and the kid says "for me! sitting in this cell for 30 something hours straight, etc, etc.."
that scene right there is classic. man i been doing the same shit for so long i have no idea what it's like to do something out of the ordinary, which is exactly what he said somewhere in that scene; doing something out of the ordinary. school work home, school work home, school work home, i been doing this shit for so long i dont know how to do anything else. whenever i get out and go to some club it's like.. i get lost in all this shit and don't know what to do or how to act. i cant even get an excitement when i go out to a supposedly exciting place, it's crazy. the inmates who get out probably go through the same shit, but this is different.. i'm not in prison, i'm free, yet my condition is that of a prisoner.
at least my fam is gone for the entire week i got the house all to myself. i'm gonna invite my female friend, watch a movie and get high in the backyard. i dont know what else to do but i studied my ass off for the test and i feel real confident about it, i hope i get a B. if i get a D i'm gonna shoot myself.
1 comment:
dayum fam.. you got the whole place to yaself.... dayum brah.. make the best of it.
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