Sunday, February 27, 2011

My mom's b/f has lost his marbles

so my mom asked me to bring 3 trees into green house. i was really hesitant cuz i didnt sleep more than 5 hours and really afraid to lift and do physical work. so even though i SOUNDED hesitant, i was like okay ill do it just wash my dishes.

So then I go outside to do it and then my mom seeing how i been suffering with insomnia started to lift one of the trees with me.. i was like 'mom... i can do it', and before i even had a chance to say anything, her b/f opens their bedroom door that goes to the backyard and starts yelling 'BABE, DONT YOU DO IT! ITS NOT THAT HEAVY! IT'S NOT THAT HEAVY!!" (my mom does have back problems and i am aware of it).. so my mom starts saying something back, i dont remember. and he starts yelling same shit or whatever. I was like 'she won't let me do it' trying to explain that I.. am... trying... to do.... this... alone... but... she ... wont... let me... this idiot opens the window, comes out, and starts yelling "ILL TAKE YOU OUT!!! ILL TAKE YOU OUT!!!" and starts throwing his hands at me... I'm thinking... "um... wtf!?!?!" and then I catch his hands and go "ARE YOU CRAZY!?".. THIS MAN HAS CANCER AND IS GOING THROUGH CHEMO!!! and here he is not even knowing what is happening barging into the situation, and throwing his hands at me talking about "ILL TAKE YOU OUT! ILL TAKE YOU OUT!".. so i say to him... "ILL FUCK YOU UP!!!" then he goes "YOURE fucked up" (he misheard me?) so im like "no YOURE FUCKED UP". then he starts yelling about my mom having back problems or whatever.. Im like IM TRYING TO DO THIS ALONE BUT SHE WONT LET ME DO IT WTF U WANT ME TO DO? so he kept yelling or whatever talking about 'he can do it, blah blah blah'.. and then he was like 'OR MAYBE HE'LL "FIGURE IT OUT"'... like wtf!?!?

first of all, this guy has cancer. 2nd, he is 50 something years old. 3rd, he is a typical American (white).. as in.... ARRRRRR IM CONFIDENT!!!!ARRRRRRR I WILL TAKE YOU OUT! YOU ARE SMALLER THEN ME AND I DONT LIKE YOU! THEREFORE, I WILL KICK YOUR ASS!!!! ARRRRRRR!!! I have taken martial arts and have heard and talked about retards like him. they go ARRRRRRRR ILL TAKE YOU OUT ARRRRRRRR IM STROOOONG! until you kick their ass. and lastly... I will fuck him up so bad... that I will let him fuck me up and hit me if I had to just so that his family members and all the others won't think im such an evil guy for kicking an ass of a cancer patient. I am really afraid to kill him, actually. GOD forbid if this goes down and I get really nervous (I got PTSD and have problems with fear getting out of control), and hit him in one of his pressure points.

I really, really, really don't like this guy. Some facts about him just to show you how much of a douche bag he is. 1) he proposed to my mother yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaars ago but refuses to marry her because "my mom told me when you marry a woman, you marry her family", 2) my mom told him to fuck off until he figures it out what he wants to do, he left and told his relatives that he is ohh so depressed and down, and my mom took him back in. imo, he tricked her. 3) until this day, he is nothing more than my mom's b/f, 4) he want(ed) to be my father figure (luls), 5) he is from Orange County who is a "good guy" and has faith in our criminal justice system (all cops are good; all they're doing is putting the bad guys away.. and I quote... "but they're[youth in the ghettos] just gangs, let them kill each other". he reminds me of a typical liberal with zero life experiences out of his own little perfect world becoming a 5.0. and harassing black people in the ghetto because they are "so rude and disrespectful." 6) he thinks he can beat me in a fight (another luls, but whatever. ill let him beat me. i need some ass kicking anyway), 7) he looks down on everyone. I.e. my mom's childhood friend came from Florida and her husband is this cross eyed Italian man. so this douche asked my mom "doesnt that (his cross eye) bother you?" and my mom was like.. yeah.. at first.. but then I find out about him as a person and i dont care about it any longer. every person he judges like that. "this guy has cross eyes" "that guy doesnt wanna hang with me and be my fake son" "this woman i dont wanna marry cuz i dont wanna marry her family, and her son i am angry at".. like.. WTF!?!? YOU AINT PERFECT YOU BITCH! YOU GOT FLAWS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE! 8) he doesnt give a fuck about other people outside of himself and his friends who he wants to help so bad. i.e. my uncle has glaucoma, and I got insomnia. I slept 3 hours and my uncle has a hard time driving at night. They made us go to San Jose to help them move when NONE of their friends would help, and kept us there until it was DARK (my uncle's issue), and complained that I am not doing a good job (my insomnia issue, it feels really hard on my heart, so I try not to do too much lifting. does he care? NO!). So, he didnt even thank me or my uncle for it and on top it all made him stay passed dark. 9) he always thinks he is right, 10) control freak. got mad at me and still mad that i dont wanna hang out with him, go to clubs/bars with him and hear him talk, play tennis with him (luls on all 3. fuck you! you aint my friend, and you not even my step-dad. you my mom's b/f. stay in yo place). hence, all this anger just came out at once (this guy will rant for 2 hours if you let him. and if you say a word back, another 2 hours of ranting)

There is a lot more but I will leave it at that. I wanna see if this asshole even apologizes.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Net 10 is a piece of SHIT

Every time I gotta re-activate this service, it brings me through loops of the same bullshit message "System unavailable, try later"

I don't use my phone and don't have many friends, so pay as you go is all I need but.. WTF!?!?!?! I gotta make a phone call and paid $30 for 300 minutes. Been trying since yesterday to activate this garbage.

Can't make phone calls here cuz my mom's b/f is yapping on the phone line all day. Funny.. I told him that radio phones are BAD FOR YOU!!!!!! He is already going through chemo with cancer, and I told him soooooooooooooooo much info about health and different books... Did he listen to ANYTHING I suggested? No! He hasn't done shit but sit on his ass and watch TV all day, another source of fear and propaganda that hypnotizes you and puts you to sleep. He talks on the phone nearly ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL day on the radio phone. It's like everything I said went into one ear, and out the other. I really don't like talking to him or even being around him. I don't like his energy.

Back to my post... FUCK NET 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Last night was scary

2 nights ago before I could not sleep at all, then the night before I had 1 hour of sleep, and last night I felt really bad. during the day my heart was hurting every few beats or so. It would be LOUD, especially when I went to bed real early around 8pm. I could hear it throughout my whole body. I managed to fall asleep around 1am and woke up at 2:30am. That's 1 hour and 30 minutes of sleep. When I woke up I automatically had 2:30 pop into my mind for some reason. Then I just decided to take a walk and do breathing exercises. I waked around my hood and did a lot of breathing. Saw moon's shadow or aura, I don't know what it was. At first I thought it was a milky way because it was half circle all around the moon.

Anyway, then I came back standing outside my house, took my shoes off and stood on the dirt holding the tree. It was around 3:15am by this time and I just stood there for like 10 mins.

I thought of going to an emergency room. So at around 5 or 6 am I fell asleep. Woke up like 3 times but managed to fall back asleep. The key was not to move while I'm laying there which was HARD AND SCARY! Heart beating like BUMP BUMP, BUMP BUMP. So I had about 8 hours of sleep, and feel much better. I really hope they approve my insurance so I can finally see a doctor.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Cluster Headache from the pits of hell

i had the most painful cluster headache in a long time just now. it just ended. lasted 1 hour. i was screaming like i was being tortured. bad enough i got insomnia and i only slept 1 hour last night.

it's sort of my own fault. didnt drink enough water yesterday. havent had a headache this bad in almost a year, and actually more than that cuz that one wasnt this severe.

i hate these headaches sooooooooo much. they feel like someone is stabbing you in your head with an ice pick.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Flue shots suck

just got one. had no choice. my mom's b/f is going through chemo. so if i didnt get one he could die if i get sick. first time getting it ever, and im just real concerned for myself with my heart hurting and all. let's see what happens.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Chakra Healing Videos

I found these a while back and they are amazing. If you turn your speakers up you could feel the vibration in your chest/heart chakra area

This city has clean air

San Francisco has got to have one of, if not THE most cleanest air in the world. I love it. Just being here makes me feel calm with the weather alone. I been doing breathing exercises and meditation. Just meditated for 1 hour until all my limbs felt numb and I felt vibrations in the them. woke up at like 3:33pm after finally getting some sleep. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't feel good

2:44am right now and I been trying to sleep since 12.. I quit my job, moved back home to San Fran to my moms, and things been looking better until a few days ago. I still had a real hard time sleeping, but I somehow managed to sleep by laying there for 8 extra hours. I would squeeze like a few hours by waking up 5 times so it would be like 7 total. But then a few days ago I had to go enroll into a hospital, and it fucked shit up for me. I had to wake up early, so had like 3-4 hours of sleep.. then they told me to come back due to me not having enough docs, i come back today and the fucking bitch tells me I have to come back again cuz I am missing another doc.. I MEAN LIKE WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!?????????????? if these people only knew my situation. fuck... now my heart hurts yet again and i hear it bump hard...

i really dont know whats gonna happen to me but i been really mad at my cousin. this SELFISH BITCH got me out to LA, I helped her with buying a TV.. she promised me that shed pay me back in full... when it came time to do it.. she got into a fight with me and didnt pay back all the money i let her borrow... then 2 months later she kicks me out after having drama and more drama in the house in which it was impossible to sleep... fast forward 1 year and 8 months... I am as fucked up as ever. havent slept properly ever since and been living in hell.. and all for what? FOR $1,000. is 1g worth polluting your family members life? LIKE DAMN!!!!!!!!!!! what a selfish bitch that cousin is.. and the part about her wanting to be close to me... another selfish thought "I" wanna be close to you.. FUCK YOU!

I swear to GOD i got some of the most dysfunctional family members in this world. I really hope I will find a good circle of friends who understand me, give me emotional support, and there for me whenever shit doesnt flow the right way. this blog entry didnt even come out the way i wanted it to but who cares. more later... if im still alive

Monday, February 14, 2011

Prodigy's Letter from Prison

Read it! I been dealing with similar events for 1 year and 7 months, going on 8. Shit is real my friends. And imo people like trojanman (and self before even my LA trip) been dealing with it damn near all our lives until we hit a breaking points and have a wake up call, spiritual awakening, or go on a columbine/virginia tech because we couldn't take it anymore. My pscychic told me that I have been having a lot of people, and spirits come through my body and it is my job to take ownage of my body. I have been doing that for a little over a month and let me tell you it is hard. But I am doing it, and not giving up.

Also, the fake and phony world will never accept these as facts. They will label these claims as propaganda and lock you up in a mental institution or prison, as for P's case, and you will never be heard from again.

I checked P's site but it doesn't exist. Either he hasn't put it up yet or the government already took it down.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

You Don't Mess with the Zohan is HILARIOUS!!!

I have not had this much fun in the 1 year and 7 months living in Los Angeles. I swear to GOD this movie has got to be the funniest comedy I have seen in a LONG ass time. In this movie Adam Sandler got back to his roots of Billy Madison, which is by far his funniest movie to date imo. And off the record... I don't find Adams Sandler all that funny lately. It's been a while since I watched a funny movie with him in it. So basically, in You Don't Mess with the Zohan, Adam plays this BAD ASS James Bond type Israeli Special Forces guy. He kicks everyone's ass, all the chicks want him, the coolest guy in Israel, etc, etc... and he goes out to takes on terrorists with his left pinky. It is just FUNNY!!! Then he somehow escapes to America to pursue his real dream (not a spoiler. this is in the trailer).

Then things begin to happen as he arrives in New York, and the movie takes off from there. I have not seen such an enjoyable and funny movie in so long, that my whole day has been AMAZING because of it. I have not felt this good period in a looooooooooooong time. Laughter really is the best medicine.

This movie even made me cry because it has a love story in it as well (I am sensitive :). It is basically Israelis vs Palestinians in Middle East and later in America. And you have got to take a break with some laughter from the real issues that have been happening every day for so long.

The accents are funny, the humor is funny (think Billy Madison), the sex references are funny, the Israeli/Jewish nicknames are funny, the guy who plays the Palestinian terrorist (John Turturro) is funny, this whole frigging movie is FUNNY!!! If you haven't seen it, go out and buy it, rent it, netflix it, whatever, just watch it! IT IS FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5 out of 5 fucking stars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Cataclysm is a piece of SHIT!

Blizzard has turned this game into the biggest joke I ever seen when it comes to video games. Reason why I purchased it is because I not only have absolutely no life, but as you can see from my blog entries may be dead tomorrow for all I know. I tried real hard to sell my WoW account but couldn't. So fate had its way and I bought the game at launch to test it and review it after (my first time buying any WoW expansion at launch). Today is my last day of game time, and it will expire at 8 something pm.

The game is fun at 80 when you level in new zones up to 85. But THAT'S IT! Some nice areas, interesting quests, etc.. If you on a PvP server you can gank and do some World PvP. But once you hit 85, World PvP is absolutely non-existent unless you are on some RP server like The Venture Co.. And even then, judging by the game's mechanics you will be spending 60% of your time fighting NPCs in cities than other players. And while you fighting NPCs you'll be relentlessly raped by others until you find a big group, which will never happen because no one cares for WPvP anymore.

Tal Barad is fucking PATHETIC!!! The controlling side has a 90% chance of winning because it's extremely easy to defend, and the attackers are pretty much FUCKED and need to WORK THEIR ASSES OFF to even get 2 towers controlled. The zone has 3 towers like Hellfire Peninsula, and you need to take them over if you attacker. If you get all 3 under control=win. People complain on forums over and over and ask Blizzard to fix this piece of shit zone, but as always Blizzard DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK!!!!! so they stay silent, and not respond.

I don't have much time to play, and I been gearing up in PvP gear. But still haven't gotten full PvP set (got full set, but 4 to 5 pieces short on off pieces) which is the 3rd best (in other words, the worst). To get 2nd best you need Arena, which I hate with passion and think it killed PvP in this game completely, or Rated BGs which get repetitive and boring. After a while you don't get any points from Rated BGs but just do them over and over to work on your rating. I won't even go into PvE. That's another 6 months of your life grinding and wiping.

Flying mounts everywhere KILL PvP completely. And I'm not talking about being ganked here. I'm talking about GUARDS IN CITIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You cannot do shit but get raped up the ass by 3 guards once you fly into a city. They will knock you off your mounts. Then if you close to another guard, 3 more guards will attack you. You move 1 step=ANOTHER 3 GUARDS ON YOU RAPING YOU EVEN HARDER!! I mean wtf!?!?!??!?? This is why no one gives a shit about PvP anymore. It was bad enough in LK, but now with this new system you cannot move an inch without having 20 guards on you. And then in 3 secs you're dead. Another thing that really really really piss me off is... RE SPAWNING GUARDS THAT COME OUTTA THIN AIR!!! You kill 3, 3 more come from literally some other dimension. Like you cannot see them there until they appear out of nowhere.

My absolute pet peeve is.. If you die in a city while you invade, you will be placed at least 3 to 5 minutes FAR AWAY to run back to your corpse! So wait.. not only do I get raped silly by guards, other players while guards are killing me, guards that come from nowhere, flying guards that knock me off my mount, but now after I die I gotta spend 5 minutes of my life WALKING BACK TO MY CORPSE SO THAT I CAN DIE AGAIN!!?!?? FUCK YOU BLIZZARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU HAVE COMPLETELY DESTROYED EVERY SINGLE ELEMENT OF WOW THAT MADE IT WOW.

And posting on the forums can get you banned for absolutely nothing! You can say "I hate this change" or "this sucks" or anything completely harmless that would let them know you fucking can't stand their shit changes=48 hour ban. Next time=76 hour ban. And last time you get banned=perm ban. I mean WTF!?!?!! You want your ban lifted? 3 months of waiting IF they even lift it. I personally don't even post on the forums any longer because it's pointless. They are filled with trolls who will make fun of you and your mama, but if you say anything back you get reported and banned.

Blizzard is nothing more then a bunch of gustapo Nazis. They change stupid shit every patch, don't listen to any of their fans, abuse and ban everyone, and then collect money from the same people who complain, bitch, moan, and then come back to play their shitty game.

Fuck this game, and fuck this company. If I could sell this sack of shit account I would. But from the looks of it, it won't be happening because it's really easy to level now. People who have no life can level in like 2 weeks to 85 through dungeons, bgs, and leveling.

I give this sack of worthless shit a 1 out of 5. 1 is for the new zones you get to explore when you level 80 to 85. Leveling from 1 just to see new revamped areas is just dumb. But it's your life and your time. Do what you want with it.