My Date with an Indian Girl

so today, I had a date with the Indian girl I last blogged about. I thought she was gonna flake and not respond, like most of my female interactions, but she didn't. We met up at our work's cafeteria. I was really busy, and had another appointment with a user at 1pm. She wanted to meet at 12:30, so I was in a rush.

I had doubts about asking her out over the weekend. I didn't really take a good look at her, and kept wondering if she's my type. But when I got there I was like damn she's pretty! But again, I still don't know. I am a Libra and we are picky af! Anyway, I got my food already, found a seat, and told her where it is while she stood in line.

As she joined me, we chit chatted and then it happened. Me being me-inexperienced, and haven't had a date in close to 5 years (if not longer). We had awkward moments but they didn't last that long. She filled them up with movies she watched, and I filled them in with some other crap I don't remember. All in all, I don't know. I think she likes me but you can never be too sure. Girls are weird. They act interested and flake, or not call back, and all just to be nice and not make you feel rejected. Even though that is exactly what they are doing.

How do I feel about this whole thing? Like I feel about everything in my life. Ashamed. Ashamed of not having experience with women, ashamed of not being exciting and fun to be around, ashamed of revealing this side of me to her. But I can't say it was that bad. I think I am just too hard on myself. I was doing what I usually do on dates, hiding. I am afraid what people around may hear when I speak, so I don't speak loud enough. It's really bad, but I guess it comes from feeling shame about everything in my life. I used to be a lot worse, though. I would be this way ALL THE TIME, EVERYWHERE, WITH EVERYBODY! I have at least improved a lot when it comes to people, and improved a little bit when it comes to women where I managed to ask this girl out. 99% of the times I don't, even though there could be all these signs of interest. I am too afraid of what others around will think, and I prevent myself from living my life.

Towards the end I said "We should do this again sometimes" before leaving. She said sure. I added "outside of this place[work]"... If anything comes out of it, I'll blog about it. If not, then even better. So that I don't have to deal with this shit. I feel like I am a 16 year old stuck in a 38 year old body. Can't even imagine how bad I will be at sex, if it ever gets to that...

I asked an Indian Girl out at work...

I know, I know... after getting red-pilled, I am 100% against race-mixing. But I am not planning on having children, so I think I am good.

I did not think I was going to do this. I haven't asked a woman out in a loooooooong ass time. And frankly, I am frightened to show any woman my lonely world. Which is why I don't ask any women out. But today at work I was helping this girl out, and she is so my type. Big girl, curvy, BBW kind. I am in IT so I was setting up her laptop. There wasn't any social pressure since we were in a private room. Then I lead the conversation to eventually bringing out the part that she is from India (took me like 3x ffs). Then it was Bollywood > Padmavatti (my favorite movie of 2018) > Shiva Goddess, etc.. and from there she was very cool. Showed me I.O.I.'s and everything. She was very surprised about my knowledge of Indian culture.

I really felt the tension, and was thinking about asking her out but hesitated 2x. Then finally I ask "Would you like to have lunch sometime?" She paused for 2 seconds...... then said yes. Then before leaving, she said "yeah, email me so we can have lunch". I guess she really likes me. She is kinda short, though. I think 5'2", or even shorter. But DAMN she is thick!

I don't know. I am really afraid about race-mixing, but not like we're going to have sex next time. It may not even work out. I just hope she won't try to use me to get a green card cuz her VISA expires in 2020. Will post more details soon...

Padmaavat

I don't even know how I found this gem. The poetic story, love, war, honor, cowardice... The most epic movie I have seen in 2018, and the greatest Bollywood film I have EVER seen. 5/5 stars...

Trump is God status in India

one of the smartest people on the planet, this group...





The biggest holocaust happened in India, in case you didn't know. Muslim cockroaches slaughtered 70 million Indians, and destroyed many of their temples. India is still suffering today as a result of these muzzrats that infested the country. Why doesn't Hollywood make a movie about that? Oh, I forgot, they keep reminding us about the "6 million". So tired of their bullshit..

TRUMP 2016!!!!!!!!!!!

This man is the last hope for America, or possibly the entire western world, to be saved.