This place has a lot of negativity

right before I moved here I was telling my roommate how "wow, Jose is not mad at me for moving". Jose was my last landlord and he is a really cool guy. And my roommate said "why should he? it's nothing personal. just business". Now I told my roommate I am moving out on May 1st and he was cool at first, but now he doesn't talk to me. He still says hi, but he never talks to me like he used to. They already moved all my stuff out of this cabinet in the kitchen that was for me without telling me. It is obvious he is mad. What a hypocrite. He is mad I won't be paying his rent next month and no one will put up with this bullshit so he doesn't even bother to post ads for the room. No way I'll be sacrificing my sleep and well being for his money. It's not happening.

Also, I been so positive lately. I do my daily affirmations, and shielding. But just today I got home from looking at a lot of places, laid down and started watching Burn Notice. All these negative thoughts came running to me "what if I don't find a place by May 1st?" "what if the place you found, the landlord lady screws you over?", etc.. I was like wtf? I do the affirmations but the thoughts keep on coming. I been real calm until today. It was until I got home from being out looking at many singles and shared apartments.

My roommies fight almost every morning. They haven't fought since he told her "if you don't stop this, I'm leaving you. I am way too young to be with someone like this. etc.." I wake up in the morning at 6am with or without noise WHEN I HAVE MY EARPLUGS ON. Either because I am conditioned not to sleep or it's just all this negativity in the house. It's chaos. But I found 2 places to chose from. If this other one don't work out I go and fill out the app for this other. Both singles so no more roommates. Will see what happens. All this chaos happening and baby crying every morning gave me so much motivation to look for a place I never thought it would be me running around town doing this stuff. I am someone who is almost apathetic to everything because of my overprotective mom. But I'm grateful for this situation. I learned a lot from it and should be outta this place by next Saturday.