Seeing is EVERYTHING!

I been so paranoid lately that I will one day stop seeing, and I dont know why. every morning i wake up, i am so appreciative that i can open up my eyes, and see things around me. Can you imagine what it would be like to not see? And I mean if you were born that way, that's different. But for someone who was being able to see and then all of the sudden you can't? That gotta be some tough times to go through. The acceptance, the paranoia, etc..

I mean hearing is bad not to have, but seeing is 10x worse in my opinion. Without being able to see you are like a helpless baby who needs others to do things for it. I met 2 blind people working on my job at my University where I was driving disabled students around campus. One of them had a genetic thing she inherited and lost her sight, and the other was a tall and big guy who was in some accident where a bullet hit him or something like that. It's crazy though because each one of them had more life then me-somebody who can actually see. The lady would dress up and go out whenever, and the man had a girlfriend. I was like "Wow! this guy is blind and he gets more play then me. Shit is pathetic". But I guess some people are just good at things and others gotta work for them because they never had that skills that they were born with. A blind man can talk better than a man who can see.

I really need to stop being paranoid about things that haven't happened and probably will never happen, and start living my life. But every day it's the same shit-wake up, go to work, come back home, use my computer, play some WoW or surf internet, etc.. go to sleep and do it all over again until the weekend comes. Then on the weekend just stay home doing nothing but playing WoW and being alone and shit. My life is really a pathetic ass existence and I'm afraid to change it because I really am scared of people. I think everybody is gonna use me or fuck me in the end so I don't trust anybody and just start being paranoid about things that are most likely aren't true. Oh well.. I gotta go to bed soon. I should go.