Disrespectful Family Visit

so yesterday I wake up... do my morning ritual, brush teeth, eat, and about to get ready to meditate... I turn on my phone and get 1 message "hey, we about to leave back to San Francisco but we're on our way to visit you. give us a call if you don't want us to come". So I'm like.. YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!

So I go ok... they are 5-10 mins away since I woke up late. Ill just wait till no one answers the door and theyll go away. They come... start yelling my name, dog starts barking at them, they keep yelling. Neighbor comes out in the front house talks to them in Spanish, they come inside. Dog still barking at them and they keep yelling my name. They get close to my house yelling my name OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. Now this is 1 day after I told them I'M DONE SEEING YOU! I saw them for 3 consecutive days they were here and told my mom OK, SEE YOU LATER. so what do they do? They barge into my fucking place uninvited waking up half the people in my hood!!! This freak show kept happening until I finally went down stairs and let them in.

They come inside, (and my mom's b/f is nosy as fuck, i hate the lil faggot in situations like these. he used to go through my personal shit when I wasn't home back when I used to live with them), brought me a bunch of BULLSHIT FOOD, half of which went to the garbage. Talking about we worry about you, you should call more often. FUCK YOU! YOU CAME IN HERE ALL RUDE AND DISRESPECTFUL, AND NOW YOU WANNA TALK TO ME MORE OFTEN??? GO TO HELL YOU FUCKING RETARDS! OMG I felt so disrespected. But I was nice.. as always. Talk to them and everything. Basically, her b/f is a control freak. He knew I am moving in a few days and wanted to see this place because if he didn't he wouldve never seen where I lived. Fucking idiot. He wanted to see it, so that after I moved, he would know where I lived, how I lived, and all the other details that he saw in my room.

I was so emberrased. I mean all my neighbors was watching and listening to this freak show going on and I was in the middle of it with my name being shoutted a billion times. I was so mad, upset, and stressed out that I DIDN'T SLEEP THE ENTIRE NIGHT LAST NIGHT. And this is when I can't sleep in this house. got about 4 hours of sleep from 7-11:30ish.

There is so much more to this but I don't feel like typing because it would be another 20 paragraphs. I e-mailed them saying FUCK OFF FOR A GOOD MONTH (not verbatim but.. you know). I feel disrespected and you cant barge into my life like this because I DONT LIVE WITH YOU ANYMORE. Im trying to do MY OWN THING. Let me stand on my own two feet instead of always trying to baby sit and spoon feed me. And then they wonder why I have such a hard time being myself around people. All my life my family like my mom, uncle, dad, etc.. been telling me "why cant you be more like him?" or "youre just like your daddy" or "everything you touch turns to shit" or *smack upside the head* whenever id piss off my father. That's my family, and I am the product of this nuthouse. My mom's b/f is just as retarded and infact, he tries to play the father role way too much, and I told his ass already he aint, and never will be my dad.

What's really interesting is that when I couldn't sleep, I felt like I NEEDED TO GET IT OUT. And not just to anyone, but to them. I needed to TELL THEM HOW WRONG AND FUCKED UP THEY ARE. I dont know if it was from meditation, or from wherever. But once I wrote them that long e-mail I felt better. Cuz usually I just keep it inside and it bottles up, not this time though. Thank GOD I have 1 good friend I can call, but he is all the way in Kansas right now. He told me I'm 100% right and they violated my privacy when I asked them NOT to come visit me. I really need someone to talk to and get a second opinion because I don't know when I'm right or wrong so I need someone else's thoughts on the issue.

for the meanwhile, FUCK MY FAMILY! I am so sick and tired of all of them scattered, part of them not giving a fuck about me, and part of them acting like this, treating me like im a little fucking child. People wonder why do some men become serial killers or end up in jail, just look at their family. It also works the same way when someone is very emotionally and whateverlly stable. It usually means their family is very together-like and supportive of each other doing all the right things in raising their children. At least now I can just relax without seeing or hearing from them fucks for a good month... or 2